Karen Alpert - I Want My Epidural Back : Adventures in Mediocre Parenting read online book TXT, PDF, FB2
9780062427090 English 0062427091 Now that I'm a mom, I know the most painful part isn't getting something giant through your hooha. It's having a real live child. If you are the kind of mom who shapes your kiddo's organic quinoa into reproductions of the Mona Lisa, do not read this book. If you stayed up past midnight to create posters for your PTO presidential campaign, do not read this book. If you look down your nose at parents who have Domino's pizza on speed dial, do not read this book. But if you are the kind of parent who accidentally goes ballistic on your rugrats every morning because they won't put their shoes on and then you feel super guilty about it all day so you take them to McDonald's for a special treat but really it's because you opened up your freezer and panicked because you forgot to buy more frozen pizzas, then absolutely read this book. I Want My Epidural Back is a celebration of mediocre parents and how awesome they are and how their kids love them just as much as children with perfect parents. Karen Alpert's honest but hilarious observations, stories, quips and pictures will have you nodding your head and peeing in your pants. Or on the toilet if you're smart and read it there., The New York Times bestselling author of I Heart My Little A-Holes and creator of the wildly popular Baby Sideburns parenting blog offers her brutally honest and hilarious take on parenting showing you that mediocre parents are awesome too.Moms and dads today worry they re bad parents. They see others on Facebook and Pinterest showing off their smiley, perfect, put-together spotless children creating masterworks of art in their gorgeously designed playrooms. They constantly hear moms brag about whipping up three-course gourmet dinners while their kids sit quietly reading books far beyond their grade level. They read posts from parents complaining that they can t get their daughter to eat her French fries because she s too full from broccoli.But Karen Alpert knows this is not reality. Despite what you hear and read every day, you do not need to be perfect to be a kickass parent. Parenting is messy. Parenting is hard. Parenting brings out the best AND the worst in adults. And some of the best parents in the world are mediocre parents. Karen proudly admits she s a mediocre parent, and in I Want My Epidural Back she ll make you believe that mediocre parents are awesome too. Karen shares her honest, crass, pee-in-your-pants funny observations, stories, quips, and essays on discipline, potty training, eating, sleeping and more that will make you laugh and have you nodding your head in recognition. Observing the world of parents and children through her edgy and unique perspective, Karen brings reality into focus, reminding moms and dads everywhere to celebrate and embrace their own not-so-perfect-yet-totally-wonderful parenthood."
9780062427090 English 0062427091 Now that I'm a mom, I know the most painful part isn't getting something giant through your hooha. It's having a real live child. If you are the kind of mom who shapes your kiddo's organic quinoa into reproductions of the Mona Lisa, do not read this book. If you stayed up past midnight to create posters for your PTO presidential campaign, do not read this book. If you look down your nose at parents who have Domino's pizza on speed dial, do not read this book. But if you are the kind of parent who accidentally goes ballistic on your rugrats every morning because they won't put their shoes on and then you feel super guilty about it all day so you take them to McDonald's for a special treat but really it's because you opened up your freezer and panicked because you forgot to buy more frozen pizzas, then absolutely read this book. I Want My Epidural Back is a celebration of mediocre parents and how awesome they are and how their kids love them just as much as children with perfect parents. Karen Alpert's honest but hilarious observations, stories, quips and pictures will have you nodding your head and peeing in your pants. Or on the toilet if you're smart and read it there., The New York Times bestselling author of I Heart My Little A-Holes and creator of the wildly popular Baby Sideburns parenting blog offers her brutally honest and hilarious take on parenting showing you that mediocre parents are awesome too.Moms and dads today worry they re bad parents. They see others on Facebook and Pinterest showing off their smiley, perfect, put-together spotless children creating masterworks of art in their gorgeously designed playrooms. They constantly hear moms brag about whipping up three-course gourmet dinners while their kids sit quietly reading books far beyond their grade level. They read posts from parents complaining that they can t get their daughter to eat her French fries because she s too full from broccoli.But Karen Alpert knows this is not reality. Despite what you hear and read every day, you do not need to be perfect to be a kickass parent. Parenting is messy. Parenting is hard. Parenting brings out the best AND the worst in adults. And some of the best parents in the world are mediocre parents. Karen proudly admits she s a mediocre parent, and in I Want My Epidural Back she ll make you believe that mediocre parents are awesome too. Karen shares her honest, crass, pee-in-your-pants funny observations, stories, quips, and essays on discipline, potty training, eating, sleeping and more that will make you laugh and have you nodding your head in recognition. Observing the world of parents and children through her edgy and unique perspective, Karen brings reality into focus, reminding moms and dads everywhere to celebrate and embrace their own not-so-perfect-yet-totally-wonderful parenthood."